Thriller
by FuzzyWuzzyWithBadHaircut
Summary: I was praying for earplugs, The sound was that of a hundred cats scraping their nail on the blackboard... Mike Newton had felt the need to, yet again, make an idiot of himself in front of the whole school" -One shot-


**I had an idea for this. I can't even believe I'm writing it! I promised myself I wouldn't write anything else for a while, you see I'm currently working on another story that I have, AND I am also starting a Harry Potter **_**Dramione**_** (Draco/Hermione) collaboration with the fabulous Kisses of Chocolate…**

**But I suppose that I need to brush up on my writing, (I havent posted anything in AGES!) ****But this idea was too good to pass up! So enjoy this short drabble of Mike Newton humiliating himself and the Cullen's geting a-boogieing!**

**Jasper POV**

I lay completely still on the bed that Alice and I shared, contemplating the day ahead. Why did I bother going back to school every day? After all these years, and all the suffering, why did I still bother?

High school was a nightmare for most children, and they only had to go through it once. As a vampire, you would think that school would be a waste of time. We's already been to almost every college in the country, and whats more we had perfect memoires so we forgot nothing. I really couldn't see Jane trooping into school each day, or at least, not without killing everyone there first.

And the new vegetarian clan that had visited our family last night didn't have to go to school either. Life was so unfair sometimes. I sighed and sat up as I heard Alice dashing up the stairs.

'Jasper!' She called angrily at me. 'What's this I see about you not wanting to go to school today! You can't miss it! It's taken me ages to set all this up!'

'Set WHAT up Alice?' I said, now suspicious of the angry pixie.

Her grin turned cheeky. 'You'll see!' She replied grabbing my arm, kissing my sweetly once on the lips before dragging me downstairs to meet the others. As we walked down, I thought quickly about Alice's strange behaviour. What was she up to? What did it have to do with our school?

I sighed, subdued. I supposed I would find out soon enough...

If I went to school.

Assembly was our first period that morning. Students yawned and chattered as the school's principal tried futilely to bring their attention back to her. But halfway through the assembly, something changed, something that got ALL of our attention..

A steady beat and the creaking of floorboards seemed to fill the school hall, we looked around for the source of the noise…

And stopped dead at what happened next.

Mike Newton bounded up on stage, and, to the music of Thriller by Michael Jackson, began to sing…

**BPOV**

I was praying for earplugs.

The sound was that of a hundred cats scraping their nail on the blackboard. It was gruesome, and at the same time you couldn't look away.

_It's close to midnight and something evil's lurking in the dark  
Under the sunlight you see a sight that almost stops your heart_

It had been a typical morning, at a typical school in Forks, WA, untill Mike Newton had felt the need to, yet again, make an idiot of himself. Even then I had a feeling that somehow the Cullens had been involved.

I would bet anything, and everything, that this has something to do with the new vegetarian vampires that I had met last night. They were exceptionally powerful, with one even having the power of hypnosis over humans ans you could bet that Alice had used that power to her own advantage.

Mike may be stupid, but even he wouldn't do this. He continued.

_Cause this is thriller, thriller night  
And Mike is gonna save you from the beast about strike  
You know its thriller, thriller night  
You're fighting for your life inside a killer, thriller tonight!_

It really was quite horrible. Mike was trying his best to dance like Michael Jackson, although not succeeding. He tried the moonwalk, and looked like he was having a seizure and if he attempted a spin, he would fall straight on his butt.

_You hear the door slam and realize there's nowhere left to run  
You feel the cold hand and wonder if you'll ever see the sun_

_Cause this is thriller, thriller night  
There aint no second chance against the thing with immortal eyes_

I frowned. Wondering if it was just me, or had the lyrics changed? Mike wouldn't have changed the song to be about vampires… would he?

And then I ceased to care at all, because something completely unexpected occurred.

Emmett and Alice got up, and started to dance. Shocked, I stared as they performed the moves perfectly. And as the Cullens often did, it seemed as though they had set a trend. The rest of the school rose slowly and followed suit, dancing as if there was no tomorrow.

_Night creatures call  
And the dead start to walk in their masquerade  
There's no escapin the jaws of the vampire this time  
(they're open wide)  
This is the end of your life_

I could see Jessica and Lauren jumping around on chairs, singing at the top of their lungs, and Tyler and Eric were doing a pretty good job of imitating undead monsters, even without the makeup.

_They're out to get you, there's Volturi closing in on every side  
They will possess you unless you change the number on your dial_

_Now is the time for Bella and I to cuddle close together  
All through the night Ill save you from the terror on the screen,  
_

Thankfully, Edward stayed sane. Or so I thought. Looking up at the stage in shock, before turning and meeting my gaze, he muttered two words to me

'Sorry love' and then he began to boogie on down.

_Ill make you see  
_

_That this is thriller, thriller night  
So let me hold you tight and share a killer, thriller, chiller  
Thriller here tonight_

Feeling confused, betrayed and more than a little disgusted I stormed out of the hall, but was closely followed by both Alice and Edward. I turned on them when we were a comfortable distance from the hall.

'How COULD you!' I shrieked. 'That was one of the most painful things I have ever had to endure!' I said, feeling my breakfast coming back up as I remembered what had just happened.

'And YOU!' I said, turning on Edward.

'How COULD _you_?'

'Me?' He said incredulously. 'What did I do?'

'As if you don't know Edward Cullen! How could you join the dark side! I expect it of them, but you? Of all people!' Edward even had the grace to look ashamed, and it served him right too! I couldn't believe that he'd had the guts to side with Mike!

Alice pouted at me. 'Oh Come on Bella! Can't you see how funny it was? And it not like Mike didn't want it! Edward tells us that he's ALWAYS daydreaming about breaking out of high school and becoming a transvestite singer in a Las Vegas casino! We just gave him a head start...' But I refused to budge, and putting on my most stubborn face I glared angrily at her.

'Alice.' Edward said softly 'Please leave.'

'Oh,' said Alice, her eyes widening and an evil grin coming onto her face. 'OK!' And she skipped merrily out of the room.

'Edward?' I said, instantly suspicious. Anything that made Alice grin like that couldn't be good. Edward took a step toward me.

'Bella.' He said softly. "I apologize most humbly for doing anything to offend you, you know I never meant any harm.' He looked ashamedly down at the floor, then flickered his gaze up, looking at me through his lashes and throwing the full power of his molten gold eyes at me.

I felt my breath catch at his gaze. Damn Edward Cullen! I could never stay mad at him for longer than ten minutes at best. I sighed, admitting defeat- and was rewarded by the glorious smile that lit his features.

'Come on Bella' he said, laughing at me. 'If we go back to the hall, Mike might give us an encore! I've always had a secret wish to see him do the Macarena in front of the whole school!'

I laughed at Edward's excited expression.

_Well_, I thought to myself.

_If you can't beat 'em, join 'em!_

**Thoughts? Suggestions? Cookies? This was just a short fic to brush up on my writing (I havent written in ages), so sorry if its a bit rusty! **

**Please Review, they make me happy and make me feel like writing. :)**

**~FWWBJH**

**P.S Can you anwser this... or aren't you smart enough?** _The man who makes it does not need it. The man who buys its does not use it. The man who uses it doesn't know he is. What is it?_


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